Not Me And Dat Eating Thing
My dear friend Hazel in Barbados often says: “When it comes to eating, I ent busy!” Like her, I feel the same. Well, for the most. I’m not a greedy girl and don’t accept service from any and everybody, but I do enjoy some good eating. Anyone who knows me is aware of my passion for the culinary arts and I’m especially thrilled when I meet a man that’s equally passionate. There are a few things as sexy as a man versed in this area. Ever since my first boyfriend showed off his amazing skills on me and served up the most mind-blowing treat, I have been sold on the idea that when it comes to eating, I’d rather relax and let a guy do the work.
Yes, men make for a delightful eating experience. It’s perhaps for this reason that men and their eating has often been a topic for storytelling. Recently, I have been reading many such stories, with a few cunning ones in between chronicling this phenomenon as an ancient practice by not just men, but also women. Even with articles coming from as far Japan, one does not need a linguist to interpret the gravity of this issue – some men are taking their eating much too far.
It was exactly a week ago today that my friend Andrew commented on his post to Facebook: “This is probably the most disgusting article you’ll read this week.” Although warned, I proceeded to click on the link, only to behold the most astonishing thing – a naked man eating another man. Actually, he was eating the man’s face. I was grossed out as I read how this crazed man in the nude, Rudy Eugene, attacked the victim, Ronald Poppo, a homeless man in Miami and starting chewing on his face. I responded to Andrew that it was the most disgusting thing I had read all year! That was until our mutual friend, Andrea posted yet another link to even more bizarre eating. This time it was Mao Sugiyama,a self-described “asexual” from Tokyo whose genitals were eaten by five diners. The twist here – Mao had cooked, seasoned and served said genitals at a banquet.
I then vaguely recalled an incident from last summer that had fleetingly took me back to my childhood days of reading Hansel and Gretel. With intentions as scary as the hag in this fairy tale, Natasha Hubbard, a homeless Los Angeles woman snatched a baby boy from his mother and tried to break off his arm to eat it. Luckily, the little boy escaped both her cannibalistic palate and any serious injury. And just when I thought I’d had enough of this eating to sicken my stomach, Alexander Kinyua, a 21-year-old Morgan State University student all but made me throw up. The Huffington Post on Thursday reported that Kinyua allegedly killed his roommate, Kujoe Bonsafo Agyei-Kodie and ate his brain and heart. I could go on with all the crazy eating stories of late, but New York (Magazine) lists them here.
Growing up in the Caribbean, I was taught the history of our indigenous people the Caribs, after whom our region is named. The Carib people arrived in our territory at least two centuries before Columbus (1492) and were said to be cannibals, known mainly for eating their war enemies. But it has been centuries since there have been any reports of cannibalism among Caribs. In fact, only a few Caribs remain in the West Indies – predominantly in the Commonwealth of Dominica in the Carib Territory and in St. Vincent and the Grenadines in villages such as Sandy Bay, Fancy and Greiggs. And not even among these Caribs – a people who history records as practising cannibalism – is there any human flesh eating in this the 21stcentury. Why now this sudden appetite among folks from Tokyo, to California, to Florida and Maryland for eating their fellow humans?
I never thought the day would come when the thought of a man eating would make me shudder, but in a way it does. I could deal with a man eating all the food I have lovingly prepared and laid out for him. I don’t mind if he gets it all on the corners of his mouth or even all over his face. I don’t care if he has such a ravenous appetite that he demands extra servings even when I say I have no more to give. I appreciate a man who eats that heartily, but I draw the line at literally being on the menu. I might be all about eating, but cannibalism? Nah dread, not me and dat eating thing!
~ I Keep it Irie ~